diff --git a/index.html b/index.html
index ad24b87..92e898c 100644
--- a/index.html
+++ b/index.html
@@ -329,6 +329,18 @@ <h1>THE OMARCHS</h1>
       "Two JPEGs, a gradient, and delusions of monarchy.",
       "Coronation was on a Tuesday. The build was red.",
       "Zero days since the last zero day, sire.",
+      "The kingdom runs on an AUR package maintained by a 14-year-old.",
+      "Wayland broke the royal screen share again, sire.",
+      "Your Majesty spent five hours configuring a status bar clock.",
+      "A sovereign nation held together by symlinks and prayers.",
+      "Bluetooth audio works only on alternate Tuesdays, Your Majesty.",
+      "Left macOS for Linux just to spend all weekend fixing sleep mode.",
+      "All hail the Monarch of modal editing, who still cannot exit Vim.",
+      "Zero commits this sprint, but the terminal transparency is immaculate.",
+      "The King proclaimed 'no build step,' yet built an entire desktop environment.",
+      "Is it an operating system, or just an excuse to avoid shipping code?",
+      "One does not simply pacman -Syu without a royal prayer.",
+      "Twelve virtual desktops, and yet no room for humility.",
     ];
 
     const jester = document.getElementById("jester");